Otherness jokes
What’s the difference between a tire and three-hundred-sixty-five used condoms?
One’s a good year; the other’s a great year!
Why did the Indian cross the road?
Because he opened a corner shop on the other side.
Sex is like show and tell: you show your pussy and dick, and then you tell each other how you feel.
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, “Mommy, mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs, and my ball got away and into your closet. When I went to get it, Daddy came in with the lady next door, and they started hugging and kissing. The lady next door took off Daddy’s clothes, and Daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed. The lady next door got on top of Daddy and started...”.
The mother cuts him off and says, “Just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me.” A couple hours later, the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face, shouting, “I’m leaving you... Go ahead, Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier.” Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. “Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs, and my ball got away and into your closet. When I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door, and you both started hugging and kissing. The lady next door took off your clothes, and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed. The lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing Mom did with Uncle Joe last summer.”
What do you call two homeless people throwing rocks at each other?
A pillow fight.
My son caught me masturbating the other day and was like, "Dad, what are you doing?" I said, "Don't worry, you'll be doing it soon." He said, "Why is that?" I told him, "My arm is getting tired."
Yo mama so poor that when she went to KFC, she had to lick other people's fingers.
Why don't gay Greek men in Greece perform anilingus on each other?
Because anilingus between two gay men is against the law in Greece.
What did the bus say to the other bus?
"Beep!"
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to the other side.
The other day my computer crashed. Luckily, there were no injuries.
Both man and woman have balls, but they like to play with the ball of each other because a person always loves what they don't have. 😁
What did one skeleton say to the other?
Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"
Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)
Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."
Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"
Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"
What's the difference between America and a flash drive?
One is USA, the other is USB. 😂😂😂
I got a new job at a trampoline park the other day. If I’m being honest, it’s got its ups and downs.
I told a cookie a joke the other day.
It just crumbled.
What’s the difference between a dirty bus terminal and a lobster with implants?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
What did one male whale say to the other male whale?
"She's gonna blow!"
What did the knife say to the other knife?
"Knife to meet you."
My mom gave my friend a blow job for good luck on his job interview, then my mom gave my other friend a blow job for his interview, and they both got the job. Now who needs good luck? Just ask my mom. My mom is a good luck charm.