Otherness jokes

Q. What color were Mohammed Atta’s eyes?

A. Blue, one blue this way and one blue the other way.

My girlfriend accused me of cheating. I told her she was starting to sound like my other girlfriend.

I heard an unusual word the other day: "Opaque."

Unfortunately, what it means is unclear.

I told a seal a joke, it went like this: "Why did the kid cross the playground?" He said, "Why?" I said, "To get to the other slide." And then he said, "That's the sealiest thing I've ever heard!"

One twin tower had a girlfriend. The other twin tower had the same girlfriend, so they both went down.

What did the Twin Towers say to each other?

Sorry if that offended anyone.

“I guess we are going down together!”

What's the difference between a Mexican and a Black person? One gets paid, the other got enslaved.

I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.

The last entry was about 12 years old.

What's the difference between a shopping bag and Michael Jackson?

One is white, made of plastic, and dangerous for children. The other is for groceries.

Two whores are watching the sun come up, splitting a bottle of Mad Dog and celebrating another night of servicing the general public. One asks the other: "Say. You ever been picked up by the fuzz?"

Her friend thinks it over, "No...but I have been swung around by the tits a few times!"

Three men are on a bench in Soviet Russia talking shit about Stalin. One of the men all of a sudden pulls out a KGB badge and says, "You two are coming with me for treason." One of the other men also pulls out a badge and says, "Not me." The third man pulls out a badge and says, "Wow? There's a lot of agents here."

The other day I went on a romantic cruise in Hawaii. Then I met my girl Zendaya on board. She was shaking her ass and playing with her penis. Then she asked me, "Hey, you wanna make love in the cabin?" I said, "Sure, sweet thang," gave me her number, kissed me on the cheek. Next day she woke up because it was a romantic nightmare.

"Don't forget you are what you eat," said one person. "Then I should eat a skinny person!" said the other.

Why does the orphan commit suicide to join the other side to see their parents?

Can two high-femme lesbians go on a date with each other?

Yes, but it will take them forever to get ready.

Two nuns are riding their bikes down a cobblestone path.

One nun turns to the other one and says, "I’ve never come this way."

The other one says, "Neither have I. It must be the cobblestones."

Dark humor is like water.

Some people get it, others don't.

What did one orphan say to the other?

"GET IN THE BATMOBILE, ROBIN!"

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What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

One gets picked, and the other doesn't.