One jokes
Four gay guys are sitting in a Jacuzzi when all of a sudden, a condom starts floating. One of the gay guys turns around and asks, "Okay, who farted?"
Why can't orphans see their parents?
Because they don't have one!
So an emo shot themselves, and so the detective decides to ask why, but it just goes in one ear and out the other.
Why did Jeffrey eat all the ice cream in one sitting?
To make room in the freezer for his special meat.
I have more cum in one testicle than you have in your whole penis.
What does one boob say to the other boob?
If we don’t get support, people will think we’re nuts.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
The picture gets hung with one nail, not two.
What do you call it when you have two Indians, one Black, and a fat White?
A s'more.
For me, the best part of depression is remaining charming around strangers but saving the misery for the ones who love you.
Therapist: And what is it about this generation that bothers you?
Satan: I give them the intro tour and they just say shit like "ooo spooky lol."
Therapist: That's not so bad.
Satan: When I showed one girl the pit of everlasting flame, she sighed and said "big mood."
What do you call an orphan that has a brother? The second one without one.
Why will the orphan never say, "Honey, I'm home?"
No one wants him, not even the bees.
What's the difference between an orphan and a pencil?
People actually have a use for one of them.
One day my mom told me not to be an actor. I said, "But mommy, I will make a lot of money!"
One, I grow some som more, yea, I am 4. I'm Caillou, I'm Caillou, I'm Caillou, that's me.
Grandma: You guy's generation is on too much technology.
Kid: Well, you're the ones that raised us.
Other family members: ...
The IRS hates when you don't have to pay your taxes with this one mind-blowing trick.
What's one piece of stationary gay kids always forget to bring to school? A ruler.
One time in my dream, I had a dream that all people in wheelchairs could walk. It was awesome; I could walk!
A woman was sitting alone at a bar, and a man approached her. He asked her why she looked so sad. She responded that her boyfriend had just broken up with her because she was too kinky.
The man expressed his amazement when he admitted that his girlfriend had dumped him because of his fetishes. After a few drinks, they decided to go back to her place.
When they arrived, she told him to make himself comfortable while she freshened up. The man complied. After a long time, she burst open her bedroom door and said, "I hope you're ready!"
She stood in the doorway wearing a latex body suit and a gas mask. She had a whip in one hand, a flogger in the other hand, and a 12-inch strap-on dangling between her thighs.
The dude looked at her and said, "Thanks, but I'm good for the night!"
She said, "I thought you said that you were kinky."
The dude replied, "While you were in there, I f-cked your cat, pissed in your plants, and came on your curtains. It's been fun!"