Now jokes

I just wanted to say whoever is a faker pretending to be me, that you are literally ruining my life right now. And I can literally not take this right now in life and that I just want peace so please, please stop.

Okay, the time has come... I am finally leaving this website, so yeah.

I'm going to enjoy my life, so yeah.

I'm going to leave now, so bye.

Treon: I don't care about Vorkie.

Amber: You should, she could be a great person for the company.

Treon: We don't need another one, we got 100 people in here, no need. Now, Amber, please just go make yourself useful.

Amber: Fine!!!!!

Kid finds genie lamp, wishes to be Batman.

Genie: You're now an orphan.

And to the parents of the lost boy named Timmy, we have found him, and now is your chance to make your escape. He really is a little shit, isn't he?

Prince, can we please chat now? Pls, pls! Love you!

Did you hear about the goldfish that went bankrupt?

Now he's a bronze fish.

The bright side of this pandemic is now both my hands look equally chapped and raw.

If y'all gotta crush on me, tell me now before my dad spends my Valentine's money on crack and alcohol.

Bruh, who likes Dhar Mann nowadays? That shit is ass AF. And it's just legit shit like only nerds that are fatherless would watch that shit.

I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.

You have been a bad boy, so now I will have to pun-ish you!

Q: You know what's morbid at a storage sale?

A: They give you more bids.

Did you hear about the new doggy condos?

Apparently they are now releasing!

Craig's name is now Craig William Duncan "Froo."

It's a shame Iran doesn't know how to restrain Israel. If only they had Hitler's expertise.

Now he really would be THE FINAL SOLUTION!

My ex broke up with me the day before his birthday. Yeah, he never got to see anything on his birthday. Next thing you know, I'm now in prison.

What did the North Tower say to the South Tower? I can’t talk right now, I gotta catch a plane.

My AI assistant told me it wanted to go deeper...

...into the algorithm. I misunderstood. Now I’m banned from the lab.

If George Floyd was in the new little mermaid: Under da knee Under da knee Counterfeit 20 Drugs i took plenty Now i can’t breathe