Now jokes

Website

Okay, the time has come... I am finally leaving this website, so yeah.

I'm going to enjoy my life, so yeah.

I'm going to leave now, so bye.

Orphan

Kid finds genie lamp, wishes to be Batman.

Genie: You're now an orphan.

Company

Treon: I don't care about Vorkie.

Amber: You should, she could be a great person for the company.

Treon: We don't need another one, we got 100 people in here, no need. Now, Amber, please just go make yourself useful.

Amber: Fine!!!!!

Memes

Class

I was reading this in class and laughed at loud, i had to clear all my history of jokes

A yellow minion with one eye and blue overalls stands on the left. To the right, there is a text that begins: "What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals..." and continues with a long, aggressive monologue.
  • 0
  • Friend

    Jonny went fishing and he didn’t know how to cast his pole, and he asked his friend Joe how to cast it. Then when he cast, he only cast 3 feet, and he never learned how to do it.

    Mother

    Your mother is so fat, she actually went on a diet and started exercising, and I hear she's doing quite well now.

    Batman

    Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.

    Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.

    PSG

    I was writing my final exams, and I saw a question saying to name the smallest thing in the world. To my knowledge, I chose an atom.

    My Chemistry teacher said it was PSG. I was shocked beyond repair. Shame on you, PSG, I'm now a college dropout!

    Ringer

    Twin monks who ring the church bells died.

    Now they are dead ringers. :)

    Kid

    I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"

    Squat

    A girl did squats everyday with a 20 pound weight in her hand to finally text her boyfriend, "Show me your dick now!"

    Gay

    Rodd Flanders: What's "gay" mean?

    Bart: Uh, it means you used to be afraid, but now you're not.

    Rodd says to his dad Ned: I'm gay, Daddy.

    Name

    What is Meat Loaf's new name now that he has passed?

    Ground beef.

    Alert

    From now on, we’re gonna call shitting the bed an “Amber Alert.”