Nothing Jokes

By the way, this joke is easily found on Google, this was not created by me, I just have not seen it in these fat jokes so I thought I'd say it.

Doctor: I diagnoss you with obesitiy. Patient: It runs in the family. Doctor: Nothing can run in your family.

What's the difference between the milkman and my dad? Nothing they are both 1 thing except he never returns with milk.

(I've been eating cereal with water COMBINATION)

What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.

What did the taliban say to the afghan? Nothing, they blew him up.

Man: How do you prepare your chicken? Waiter: Nothing special, we just tell them they’re going to die.

what did the shoe say to the other shoe?

nothing it was tied up in a other conversation

Bully: YOU ARE SO STOOPID Classmate: does nothing Bully: OI, IM TALKING TO YOU Classmate: Oh you're talking to me, I thought you were talking to yourself.

What do you say to a women with two black eyes?

Nothing, you've told her twice.

DH: I asked my girlfriend what she wanted to eat, she said nothing. So I brought her to Africa.

Dark..Humor :)

What's the difference between my arm and legs? Nothing I slit both of them

what did the bird say to the other bird

nothing because birds cant talk

What’s the difference between an onion and a photo of a dead relative, nothing they both make you cry when you look at it

what do a priest and a pedo nothing they both like kids.

What did the man say after he slipped and fell on the ice. Nothing he just gave everyone the cold shoulder

a conductor was conducting a song, at the end he through his conductor's stick and killed someone, he was put to the electric chair but nothing happened, they asked why he didn't die and he replied, "I'm a bad conductor"

A pregnant wife and her husband were in a hospital as she was in labour, the doctor suggested using a machine that transfers the birth pains from the mother to the father, they agree so the machine is used, 40%, the husband feels nothing, 70% still not felling anything, 100%, nothing. The doctor says it must be broken. When the pair return home, the milkman is dead in the front yard.

What do sprinters eat before a race? -- Nothing, they fast.

If your reading this then your life means nothing ........

Have a nice day 🙂😊

When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”