Not Jokes

Men and women are not equal, speaking biologically and mentally. I don't care what other feminists say. Men are naturally physically stronger, while women are more mentally stable (sometimes). The internet and the media will lie. You feminists say that you are stronger. Well, you wish. You can't hit a girl because she is more sensitive, but she says she is stronger. Like, what the hell?

We're not sexist men; you're sexist women. And BTW, you'll rot in hell for hating God's creation. And also, men were created before women. Search it up in the Bible or online.

Her: "Land of the free".

Me: *fat*

Her: What do you mean?

Me: It's not fat-free.

"It's not a war crime if you win the war."

- Sun Tzu, The Art of War

"You may not rest, there are monsters nearby."

-Sun Tzu, The Art of War.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Not your parents.

Your mom checked for your hairline, but she could not find it.

What's the difference between a gun and a penis?

The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.

What chips are you not allowed to give to orphans?

Family size.

My grandmother made her passage on the Titanic. The ship was not the only thing that went down.

Yo mama so fat when the doctor saw her weight on the scale he said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"

Why could dinosaurs not talk? Because they were dead.

Dark humor is like life:

Not everyone gets it.

"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Not your dad."Random kid: "My dad went to get milk. My mom said he will be back soon."

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa, not screaming in terror like all the passengers on the plane he was flying.

People said that Kobe could fly so high, but that did not end well.

Why do orphans never get 5 stars in GTA 5? Because they are not wanted!

Why could not the 11 year old watch the pirate movie?

because it was rated RRRRGGGG.

I am guessing you don't understand :(

My wife and I have made a difficult choice and have decided we do not want children.

If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.

"Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate."

"Rock-a-bye baby on the treetop, When the wind blows, the baby will drop. Then the baby will lay on the ground, Not moving a muscle, not making a sound."