Not jokes
Why are sex toys something to stuff in your asshole and not a big racecar?
Your mom does not need the internet. She's already worldwide.
Dark jokes are just like food.
Not everyone gets it.
One day, Billy cow wandered off to the railroad tracks where his mother always told him not to go. His mother asked him where he had gone when he got home. He replied that he was just going for a graze. His neighbor later told his mother he had saw him at the railroad tracks. What would you call Billy cow now?
Ground Beef.
When men watch football but not the women's version maybe there.
It's not a joke.
What did the skeleton say when his girlfriend said, "I'm gonna break your heart?"
He says, "Go ahead, you're not breaking my 206 healthy bones!"
Women getting paid is bad, women should not get paid...
What does a kid say to an orphan, "Where are your parents?"\n\n"I don’t have parents. Where are yours? Are you an orphan like me? I hope not!"
Why didn’t Steven Hawking go to heaven? Because it was a stairway, not a rampway.
What's the difference between a bad joke and an actually bad joke?
An actually bad joke is not funny, like this one!
How cool is NASA?
Not cool at all.
What is the difference between a human and a tree and a house? Is for dinner today after school today after I have school 🏫 I have for kids dinner 🍴 was that I had dinner 🍴 night night dinner 🍴 night is what time it when we went and get the dog 🐶 night and dinner 🍴 night I love 💕 it is the one ☝️ I did not have time today.
Why will the orphan never say, "Honey, I'm home?"
No one wants him, not even the bees.
If a dog is white with black spots, then it is 90% great and 10% guilty because it half way starts crimes and is a mistake to the world and is punished by the white dogs that are full white and not mixed colors.
A man from Brooklyn is arguing with an Englishman. He says things like,
"It's an elevator, not a lift!"
and
"It's a bathroom! Not 'washroom'!"
He keeps going on until the Englishman says,
"Hey wanker, it's a school, not a god damned shooting range."
A fat man was checking his weight and sucking in his fat belly. A physicist saw it and said that's not how the law of conservation of mass works.
Plot twist: The fat man jumped on the physicist and proved him wrong. Now the physicist doesn't have mass.
Why does the orphan not buy milk?
That's what their parents are doing.
"Cancer gives you weed. It’s not healthy."
What do you call cheese that is not your cheese?
Not yo cheese!