This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
I was watching the local chief police in America, he said we will never forget 911. I thought i should hope not its your phone number.
Why is Steven Hawkins going to hell............. because its a stairway to heaven not a ramp!
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
the teacher told me to put my MP3 away so i brought out my MP5, now that bitch knows what not to tell me
The Pope and Donald Trump are on stage in front of a huge crowd.
The Pope leaned towards Trump and said, “Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, like that of your followers, but go deep into their hearts and for the rest of their lives whenever they speak of this day, they will rejoice!"
Trump replies, “I seriously doubt that. With one little wave of your hand? Show me!”
So the Pope slapped him.
Poor Stephen Hawking couldnt pass the ̈im not a robot ̈ test
a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says "If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone's drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try?" the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.
I got a new pair of gloves today, but they're both 'lefts' which, on one hand, is great, but on the other, it's just not right.
A Catholic priest finds a young boy crying at the top of a cliff.
“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
The boy points down. “Mummy and Daddy were in the car and it went over the edge”.
The priest can see the flaming wreck below. He looks around and sees no one else is about and starts to unbutton his belt
“It’s really not your day, is it?”
In my spare time I help blind children. -- I mean the verb, not the adjective.
I'm not lazy, I'm just bone tired. I bet that one tickled your funny bone. It sure got me rattled. Don't try to stop me. I've got a skele-ton of these!
No one has the right to look down on others unless you're perfect, and looking down on others is not perfect either
it’s just true
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
dark humor is like parents not everybody gets it
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Girl: I've been a orphan since I was three.
Boy: knock knock.
Girl: ..Who's there?
Boy: not your parents!
Want to watch Titanic? No, I'm not on board for it.
My wife told me pass her lip stck but i gave her a glue stick now she is not talking to me
Are you enjoying my yolks. I bet there making you crack up. If not, I better scrammble
