Not jokes
A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, “WHO THE FUCK FUCKED MY WIFE!”
A man in the back responds, “YOU AIN'T GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!”
What’s something you can say about a fat person, but not about strippers?
Those legs sure hold a lot of weight.
Hello worstjokesever.com, I am not typing but instead using a microphone to speech, ding me a period.
I don’t see what’s coming up, but I don’t know why I am sending, so it will be random or funny or just stupid, LOL. So like and subscribe and...
What did the racist Catholic priest say?
"Martin Luther? Not my king!"
A lady comes into the boys' bathroom and a boy sees her.
"This is not a girls' bathroom," he says.
She answers, "I don’t care," she says, "I NEED TO PEE!"
Ali from Kazakhstan, he got small forehead, all his friends laugh. They say, "Ali, your forehead so tiny, you need magnifying glass to see!" But Ali, he not care, he proud of his unique look. When he wear hat, it look like top of mountain, so funny, everyone laugh with him. Ali know small forehead no problem, it make him special, like rare gem!
My parents said to me, "Whenever you say sorry to someone and they say, 'It's okay,' it's really not."
So I said, "Okay."
Why do emo kids not like trees? They always leave them hanging.
Why do orphans not love their parents?
Because they don’t have parents.
Why do orphans not play baseball?
Because they can't make a home run.
Umm, Tyrone did not get his chicken.
9/11 was a round of Clash of Clans; they knocked down 2 towers, not 3.
Why did the terrorist not get paid, but they loved their job?
They di2s drying plans.
What is the difference between an Isis training camp and a school?
Not sure, I just fly the drone.
Julie: What's the difference between a chimp and a pizza?
John: I don't know.
Julie: Remind me not to send you to the store...
Why did the terrorist not go undercover?
Because he blew it!
I told my mom, "Do you want to see a magic trick?" She said yes. I said, "You are going to have a hot dog and cream pie together." My mom said, "No, I'm not," but I told my mom, "I'm going to need your assistance." First, I need you to lick and suck on my hot dog that is attached to me, which she did. The next minute my mom has a cream pie over her face. Then I told my mom, "You see, you are going to have a hot dog and cream pie together." Then my mom said, "When you are right, you are right."
Why are Liverpool not disabled friendly?
They never walk alone.
Opponent fist attacks your face, no you can not activate a trap card.
Always breathing down my neck, my vampire girlfriend does not give me any space.