Night jokes

Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.

The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.

I just got off the phone with Kristen Stewart yesterday. She said I was invited to her cookout this Friday. I said I'll come by and bring some drinks, like wine, beer, and liquor, so we can get our freak on all night and drink some cherry wine until daybreak ends.

I wanna date you.

Said mom, dad said no, you are a horrid, f*cking d*ck.

Kris is so dumb that his smartwatch went to NIGHT SCHOOL.

My Son: "Mummy, why is my name Thomas?"

Me: "Because the night you were conceived, I had a train run on me."

Jesus walks into a motel, puts three nails on the counter, and says, "Can you put me up for the night?"

I'm so bored and miserable, that I have sex with my inflatable girlfriend every night.

The best part? She don't talk back.

I said, "Are you half left or half right?"

"Neither! In-between."

"What?! In between your mom's tits when you go to sleep with her at night?"

Your mum's vagina is so ravenous, that last night we both ended up on the living room floor, with her on top. She was eating my creamy young face off.

Your mom was absolutely getting drilled by me on the living room floor last night.

My wife and I watched the movie Indecent Proposal last night. Afterwards, I asked her if she'd sleep with Robert Redford for $1,000,000. She said, "Sure, but where am I gonna get that kind of money?"

Jesus walks into a hotel, hands the inn keeper three nails and says, "Can ya put me up for the night?"

I may not be your cup of tea, but I am definitely your 10th shot of tequila.

Went home with a woman last night. I was greeted at the door by a Mongrel.

I say Mongrel, it was her Down syndrome son trying to process if I was a stranger or not.

How much context, pecker? You Press context categoria, go Discord.

Drink tea with friend game night.

What do you say when you hear someone tripping over at night?

Goddammit, Jamal!

I am the Titanic, and I'm looking for a place to crash tonight.

Yo mama so nasty, she gave yo daddy head, then gave you a kiss good night.

"There is no way you can fit in there."

"Says who?"

"Your mom."

"When?"

"Last night."

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-"

Last night I slipped on a banana.

My friend said it was a-peeling!