Bro used the quadratic formula to calculate the velocity of your -234 going down hairline.
Worst Jokes Ever
Why are orphans so happy on Christmas? Because they might get a family.
Look, Bono is a great guy, but shopping with him is a pain, because he still hasn't found what he is looking for.
Your hairline goes as far back as the cavemen. Your forehead is also as deep as the cave.
So, a woman gives birth to a child, and the doctor grabs it by the leg and holds it upside down. Then, he starts swinging it around the room, slamming it into the furniture. The mother tries to get up and starts screaming and crying, “Let my baby go, you sick bastard!” The doctor looks at the mother and stops swinging the baby. He is holding it by the left leg and starts chuckling, “I’m just kidding, it was already dead.”
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home plate is.
What do you call an autistic My Little Pony?
Twilight Special.
Being a hooker shouldn't be illegal.
It's like having an Airbnb for your dick.
How many emos does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they just sit and cry in the dark.
Q: What is Germany's favorite board game?
A: Nahtzee (Yahtzee).
Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
A. Because he got hit by a truck.
I was once friends with a schizophrenic emo. He tried high-fiving a tree, but it only left him hanging.
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
A: Because they come back, unlike their parents.
Why did the orphan turn gay?
A: Because he wanted someone to call him "daddy."
My grandpa told me I was too dependent on devices. I told him he was a hypocrite and unplugged him from his life support.
Why does Mao Zedong like the east coast?
Because there is a red Sun in the sky.
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.
We all know 6 is scared of 7 because 789, but why did 10 have PTSD?
He was stuck in the middle of 9/11...
How do you cure a ginger?
Chemotherapy.
A man sees a crying woman by a pond. She is in a wheelchair and has no arms or legs.
He asks her why she is crying, and she answers that she has never been hugged. Feeling pity, he hugs her, then jogs away.
The next day, he finds her crying again, and she says she has never been kissed. The man kisses her and jogs away again.
On the third day, the man sees her crying and asks her thrice. She tells him she has never been fucked. The man picks her up and throws her in the pond, telling her, "You're fucked now!"
