Worst Jokes Ever
What is a penguin without a pen? A guin...
A swan, a goose, and a penguin walked into a bar... I ducked.
F*ck my ass.
1 + 1 = window.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because seven eight (ate) nine.
Here's a joke... you.
When Stephen Hawking was asked why he was instantly attracted to his new girlfriend, he said, "It's simple, she pushes all the right buttons."
Why's missy Shaw such a slug? Because she's obese. Hahahahahaha!
Why did the kid named Jeff become gay? Because he grew up without a father figure. Hahaha, I love dark humor!
What is 2+2? Fish.
What's the difference between a gay guy and an oven?
An oven doesn't fart when you take your meat out.
My mum told me to stop playing with my sister. She said, "At least wait for her to be born first."
One apple a day keeps the doctor away; not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.
I almost got run over by a car.
For the rest of the day I was taking the backseat as I was wheely tried.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I have a gun,
GET IN THE VAN!!
Ed is dumb.
You calling me gay, but the pole is straighter than you.
This gay guy was so happy with his new boyfriend that he took him to his favorite gay bar.
An hour or so goes by, then the new flame says, "I just LOVE this place, everyone is so nice, food is great, but what's up with the monkey way down there?"
His friend says "OK, watch this." He goes up behind the chimp and smacked him in back of its head. The monkey jumped off the stool, pulls down his zipper, and gives him head. When finished, the chimp took a napkin, cleaned himself, pulled up his zipper, then jumped back to his chair.
He walked back to his new gay friend and said, "What do you think of that?"
"MAN, I seen some amazing things, but never like that!" His squeeze said, "Wanna give it a try?"
"I sure do, JUST DON'T hit me as hard as you hit that monkey."
Yo mama is so skinny, she uses floss as toilet paper.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in and I'll tell ya.