Worst Jokes Ever
The Columbine High School basketball team hasn't been the same since they lost their two best shooters.
what do you call a retard smoking weed?
a baked potato.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?
I give a fuck if my computer crashes.
What do you call a grey, fat, and very old unicorn?
A rhino.
Yo mama's so old, when she was a girl, rainbows were black and white.
What is the cheapest kind of meat?
Deer balls, two for under a buck!
A man went into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian said: “Fuck off, you won’t bring it back.”
How do you circumcise a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.
God said, "Let there be light," and it was lit!
Johnny: Mommy, Mommy! What is incest?
Mom: Shut up and keep licking.
What’s the hardest part of the vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? Matt.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? Bob.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel.
Yo mama's so poor, I knocked on the front door of her house and realized I was already outside in her backyard!
I like my couches like my women... Old, used, and big enough to fit 3 men.
I believe "Self-Baptism" is a nice way of saying "Failed Suicide Attempt."
"Luck of the Irish my ass, I just blew a tranny and an engine in my truck both in the same week... Boy it really ruined my day when they found out about each other."
What did the skeleton say to Shrek?
"Jump on me. I can have two layers of skin too."
Our family is known for unusually sloppy diarrhea.
It runs in our jeans.
I’ve been told I’ve got a perfect cock. She sure was hard on me when I cut it off, though.
I've been told I've got a perfect cock.
She sure was hard on me when I took it from her, though.