What do Orphans say on Father's Day?
Well, not "Happy Father's Day."
Yo mama so fat you can see her from 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 galaxies away!
What do you call an orphan's family picture?
A selfie.
One time, me and the bois got drunk and we were on the freeway...
...when the road was closed because a wild animal species named “The Cult” was on the loose.
Slow and steady wins the race...
...but it will never fix your ugly face.
Boss: Can I do a reference check?
Me: I don’t have a...
*sensei appears*
Me: oh no
Sensei: He was a good student, but he lacked kizma.
Boss: What's kiz...
Sensei:😈
Me: Oh no, here we go.
Sensei: Kizma AS-
Me: Hey, are you going to Sawcon?
Sensei: What is that?
Me: Saw con deez nu...
Sensei: Oh, is it for people with ligma?
Me: What’s ligm...
Sensei: 😈
Me: no no no no
Sensei: Ligma ba...
Are you Shane Dawson?
Because I can be your pussy.
What is Spiderman's favorite rice?
Uncle Ben's.
I asked my dad to come to my Father’s Day breakfast.
The orphanage worker just said, “Don’t be silly!”
What do you call a fat downie?
A couch potato.
What do you call a bunch of autistic kids in a box?
A toolbox.
Me: If my face looked like yours, I would sue my parents.
Sensei: That’s funny, because when your parents dropped you off at the temple, they got a fine for littering.
Cop: Hehe, that’s funny because I gave them the fine!
Is anyone going to Sawcon?
Your kid's so ugly he would make a Happy Meal cry.