Worst Jokes Ever
So Timmy was walking down the street with his friend Lea. Suddenly a car drives by and Timmy waves at the car.
Lea looks at him, puzzled, then later asks him; "Why'd you wave at that car back there?"
Timmy replies "Oh that was my brother, he went to the bar. He must just be driving home..."
Bob: usudgbhdkb g
Ham: usudgbhdkb g
What did one orphan say to another? Where's your home?
Why do Indian men marry fat women?
What does a skeleton tile his roof with? Shingles!
What did the cow say to the sheep?
“Moo!”
What did the sheep say to the cow?
“That was a bad joke!”
How do Asian people name their children?
They throw a pan down the stairs.
What would your name be? Msg it to @chelsearosegraham.
What did the chef say to the skeleton?
"Bone appetit!"
I was in my guitar class and my strings were dead, and then I realized they were more dead than George Bush on November 30, 2018.
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
You know why seven ate nine? Because 7, 8, 9.
So, about a year ago I was riding a horse, and out of nowhere the horse tried to flip me off it and I fell off. I would have been OK, but my foot got stuck in the stirrup. The horse dragged me along and didn't stop.
I would have died if it weren't for the Walmart manager who came out and unplugged the horse.
Dang, it got ketchup on my sleeve. What do I do?
Spread the love!
I named my dog 5-Miles, so now I tell people, "I walk 5-Miles every day."
Hippity Hoppity, women are my property.
Bippity Boppity, get the f*ck off my property!
Get up, you lazybones!
My friends and I were talking about this really ugly girl at our school. For some reason, she had the same name as me.
What do you call a fish with no legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Break!
I knead bread.
I have breakfast with my boys.