Worst Jokes Ever
Why couldn't the bike stand up by itself?
'Cause it was two tired!
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
He was stuck in the crack.
What do you call a short person that goes to school?
A Sammie.
What do bees do when they get married?
They go on a honeymoon.
Did you hear about the new German microwave? It has ten seats in it.
How much do the bones in your body weigh?
A skele-ton!
Why did 7 kill 11?
Because now 7 was even.
What’s the point in a cow going to the cinema? To be a-moo-sed!
You might find this joke a rib-tickler, but I sure do.
ABBaS.
My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?"
The doctor replied, "He's going through a midlife crisis."
I was going to tell you a joke about paper, but it was too TEAR-ABLE. HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!
I had a gold fish who could breakdance on the carpet.
For 20 seconds.
And only once... :(
I walked up to a cat and started to sing a song. The cat said, "HECK NO!" then ran off. I follow it while still singing "BABY COME HOME TO ME!!"
What do you call a stick with a string on the end of it?
A fishing pole.
I accidentally hit an orphan with my car, but I was not worried because he couldn’t tell his parents.
On a hot summer's day, a famous celebrity tweeted, "It is a beautiful day, and I'm deciding which kid to have fun with today." To which the local priest replied, "I too am deciding which of your kids to have fun with today."
Go fuck yourself!
Where in hell is Lee Harvey Oswald now when we need him?
Americans won't have a Thanksgiving Dinner this year. Why not? They sent their turkey to the White House.