What is the difference between a human and a tree?
And walk, walk home, and...
What did the traffic light 🚦 say to the car 🚗? Don’t look, I’m about to change!
What school did we say it was today? What did the snow say? "I love!"
What is tyyyyyyyyu?
When I went to the doctor, he pulled his wife in and said, "What do you see?"
I replied, "A fat bitch." He said, "Ok, your eyesight is perfect."
1. Your face is so ugly, I thought it was deformed. It probably was anyways.
2. Even if Donald Trump had time to build a wall, it was probably so you won't squish us with your fatass.
If someone says your face is deformed, just say that's what happens when I look at you.
Welcome.
I think there will be many more jokes afoot! 👣
What should you name a dog without any legs?
It doesn't really matter. No matter what you yell, he's not coming.
Why did the silly girl put sugar under her pillow?
She wanted to have sweet dreams. 😂
"Did you go to the biscuit eating championship?"
"Yea, it was crackers!"
Andrew drew a picture of Andrew.
What do you describe Titanic as?
... Broken...
New civil war themed porn title: “Harriet Tubman gets hit with something other than an iron ingot.”
What is a cannibal's favorite dessert?
Brownies.
What's an orphan's favorite movie?
"Home Alone."
What's the difference between an egg and a wank?
You can beat an egg, but you can't beat a wank.
Why'd the chicken cross the road?
That doesn't matter, we need to get the best joker to go back to posting here, he was funny but now people say they are him and ruin his good name, he was the top of the charts for over a year, so screw all these chumps! Bring back THE REAL SPECIAL!!!
Also, the chicken dies in the end, ha ha, funny, whatever.
Two Australians walk into a bar. They run into the ceiling fan immediately.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Uriah. Uriah who? Keep Uriah on the ball, Laquon Treadwell!
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to the Super Bowl game.
They had great seats right behind their team's bench.
After the game, the guy asked his girlfriend how she liked the experience.
"Oh, I really liked it!" she replied, "Especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, "What do you mean?"
She said, "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!' I’m like, hellooooo! It’s only 25 cents!"
