Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?
One's fun to hang to with a sledge hammer, the other is just a watermelon.
My ex was so full of shit, she probably poured toilet cleaner in her nose to get relief.
What do orphans and apples not have in common? Apples get picked.
I went to McDonald's and I saw a line of fat people because they were selling free hamburgers.
Child: *drinking milk*
Farmer: Hey, what are you doing?
Child: Oh, I just milked one of your cows.
Farmer: We don't have any cows, we only have bulls.
Child: *realizes*
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"The FBI."
"The FBI who?"
"Are you dumb? It's the f#cking FBI, now open up!"
A guy asks a girl to go to a dance. She agrees, and he decides to rent a suit. The rental has a long line, so he waits and waits, and finally he gets his suit.
He decides to buy flowers, so he goes to the flower shop. The flower shop has a long line, so he waits and waits, until he finally buys flowers.
He picks up the girl and they go to the dance. There is a long line into the dance, so they wait and wait.
Finally, they get into the dance, and the guy offers to get the girl a drink. She asks for punch, so he goes to the drink table, and there is no punch line.
😭 😫 🤔 😳 😊 👨 👩 👨
Why did a bisexual man wanted a physically handicapped ♿ 👨💼 👨 👬 gay man to give him a anonymous blowjob under the stall inside the men'restroom 🚻 🚹 at a restarea? because getting a blowjob from a call girl 👧 cost $75.00 👬 👬 👬 👬 👬 👬 🍌 🍌 🍌 🍌 🍌 👬 👬 👬 👬 👬 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭
Why can't George Floyd breathe? He had a knee on his neck, stupid.
Stop hating on pedos. At least they drive slow in school zones.
Do you know who Helen Keller is?
Neither did she.
Ur momma's so fat that when she became a spy her codename was OObese.
What's the difference between a government and a pawn shop?
They lower you.
When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"
Humanity.
They finally released the audio recording from the black box in Kobe’s helicopter.
Apparently when the helicopter caught fire, Kobe was sitting right next to the only fire extinguisher. You could hear everyone screaming for him to put out the fire, but he couldn’t figure out how to use it. They begged and pleaded for him to give the extinguisher to anyone else... the last thing you hear is Kobe saying “I’d rather die than pass it!”
If you are having sex and your feet are out of the tent, it doesn't count.
Did you know that your son has been deeper inside of your wife than you have...unless you put the coat hanger up there?
What do dino nuggies and the brown M&M have in common?
I want to fuck them both.
Dino nuggets are kinda hot. Also, I want to fuck the brown M&M.