Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Loan

    • A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation."

    Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.

    The frog says $30,000.

    The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.

    Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.

    The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

    Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.

    She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what the heck is this?"

    The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

  • 2

    • KFC

    • KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."

  • 1

    • Man

    • Three men walk into heaven at the same time. They all live in the same city. God asks the first man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I have a heart condition, and I've been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. Anyway, I get home from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hanging off the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guy's fingers! He falls into a bush, so I throw a refrigerator on him." God asks the next man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I was cleaning the windows, and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! Luckily, I fall safely in a bush! But then a refrigerator falls on me!" God asks the third man, and he says, "I was the one in the fridge!"

  • 0

    • Threat

    • Nina, you better run to hell. You're going there anyway!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You don't be mean to Alex!!!!!!!!!!! He is sweet, kind, loving, and protective!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!