Worst Jokes Ever
Why did God give women legs?
1. To look at.
2. To wrap around your neck when you’re eating her out.
Why do dogs lick their balls? Because they can.
What does 2016 and 2020 have in common?
A monkey caused worldwide outrage.
Did you hear about the racist sprinkler?
It kept going: "Spick spick spick Chink chink chink!"
Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble?
He got caught playing with his Privates!
What do you call that big, useless piece of skin attached to the outside of a vagina?
A woman.
Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"
Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"
What do you call a German lesbian?
A krautmuncher.
Orphans and punching bags are almost the same.
They both get hit, but a punching bag is still wanted.
How many gangsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
35! Do you have a problem with that?
Mickey Mouse went to a psychologist and told him, “I’m having problems with my girlfriend.”
The psychologist said, “You mentioned that you think she is crazy.”
He said, “I didn’t say she was crazy, I said she’s fucking Goofy!”
What’s blue and comes in brownies?
Cub Scouts.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's?
They both like to slide their meat between 10 year old buns.
Why'd the rubber go flying across the room?
Because it got pissed off!
What do you get when you cross a deer and a pickle?
A dildo.
Doin (DYM 50)?
Ewwwwwww!
Ex: baby i miss u.
Me: sorry i can't talk, i'm at a funeral.
Ex: who died?!
Me: my feelings 4 u, bitch.
To all the children on this website, hello!!!!! Hey!!!! How is life treating you?
(BTW I'm a kid, too. I'm Hayley, and I'm turning 13. My B-day is 10/08/2008.)
Kids are so ungrateful sometimes. I bought a wheelchair for my son. Did he say thank you? Nope! That mtf just sat in his wheelchair the whole time crying the whole day. 😐