Worst Jokes Ever
Why haven’t any women gone to the moon?
A: It doesn’t need to be cleaned.
How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer?
A: None, it should be opened by the time she brings it.
If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be 10 babies in one trashcan. Morbid humor would be one baby in ten trashcans.
Why can you not let an orphan touch an iPhone 7? Because it would break if they touched the home button.
I should name my dog Ariana Grande.
That way I could say that I fucked Ariana Grande.
What did the acorn say when it grew up?
Geometry.
(Geometry= "Gee, I'm a tree!")
What did one mouse say to the other mouse when it tried to steal the cheese?
"That's nacho cheese!"
How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.
Me: Hey, do you wanna hear a joke?
Friend: Sure.
Me: Why don't churches have WiFi?
Friend: Why?
Me: They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
Yo mama so fat, when she walked in the room, we missed three seasons of our show!
Have you heard about the Pillsbury Dough Boy? He died of a yeast infection.
What's the difference between "ooh" and "aah"?
About 3 inches.
P.S. Please comment and like!
"I LOVE YOU JACK!"
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
There was an animal on my porch, then I shot it in the head. It was strange that it had coffee in its hand. I flipped it over, and it was an animal, but it looked a lot like my kid.
How do you help a depressed kid face their fears... You count to 3 and say jump?
What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the walls.
A morbid joke would be what's going on in my mind.
Q. What is the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid? A. The phrase "jump rope" means different things.