Worst Jokes Ever
Teacher: What do you want to be when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.
Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.
Why do Mexicans only drink hot drinks?
Because they're afraid of ice!
Family all eating at the table.
Brother: "Hmm, I think I feel gold."
Sister: "Stop the cap."
Brother looks under the table and says, "Nope, just a gold digger."
Dad laughed.
Stepmom storms out of the room.
I still remember my grandpa's last words.
"Stop shaking the damn ladder!"
Studies have shown that in London, a person is stabbed 24 times a second. Poor bastard!
Give a man a plane ticket, he’ll fly for a day. Push a man out of a plane flying 10,000 miles up, he’ll fly for the rest of his life.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked.... (not the orphan)
If I had a garden, I would put your tulips against my tulips... 🌷
Are you a keyboard? Cause you're my type.
Even if there were no gravity, I would still fall for you...
Big (DYM 78).
Doctor: Do you want the good news or the bad news first?
Patient: Good news!
Doctor: We are naming a disease after you.
Why do dwarfs work at Tesco?
Because every little helps!
A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.
"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"
Being a man that is poor really isn't that bad as long as you are involved in the world's oldest profession and you are well-endowed and you are not homophobic and as long as you can suck the chrome off a tailpipe then you have nothing to worry about if you are desperate enough to pay your bills.
Lack of money is the root of all evil. 😊
9/11, 911, same thing.
I looked up "I have whiplash" on WebMD, and it diagnosed me with slavery.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special Forces.
Why do pedos hate corona? Because they have to stay two meters away from children. 😈