Worst Jokes Ever
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because dad never came home with the milk.
Dark humor is like sex. Not everyone gets it.
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."
If there was a girl and a boy and the boy fell, what did the boy do to the girl?
He fell for her.
Why did the lil kid cut himself?
Answer: Because he was emo, HAHHHAHAHAHAAHHA!
Man: I'm here for the job interview.
Employer: Oh good, good. Sit down. We don't get many people for the interviews.
Man: Just anywhere?
Employer: Yeah, make yourself comfortable. Jackson, right?
Man: Yeah, that's me.
(Shakes hands and sits back down)
Employer: So what makes you eligible for the job, Jackson?
Man: Well, I'm really good at capturing the perfect shot and angle. It really takes dedication to do this type of job. Concentration and willpower, sir.
Employer: I like you already, you're hired!
Man: Wow, thanks, sir. I know I won't do you wrong. I'll work hard for this job!
Employer: You start now! Your first person is a man named John F Kennedy.
Man: What? You want me to just take pictures of him during the parade?
Employer: No.
Man: This... This is a photography job, right?
Employer: No... this is a job employment for man hunting.
Why do orphans live on the street?
They don't have parents to put a roof over their head.
How do you make people mad? You use the wrong category. It makes them go red.
Why can’t blind people eat fish?
Because it is seafood.
My friends were the pilots on 9/11, they told me, "Bro, chill, it's just a prank!"
What were the terrorists on 9/11 thinking?
"We can't go over it." "Can't go under it." "We have to go through it!"
1 minute silence for those who still think thoughts can't kill you.
Harry Potter has an invisibility cloak, I have family.
I was just fine being bisexual... Now I’m gender fluid... great...
It would just be easier to be a gay guy, instead of a gender-fluid bisexual.
Listen, Man United might not thank me but get the contract out, put it on the table. Let him sign it, let him write whatever numbers he wants to put on there, given what he's done since he's come in. Ole's at the wheel, man. He's doing it. He's doing his thing. Man United are BACK.
I went to the orphanage and yelled "your mama" jokes.
From your mom.
Yo mama, why do you have to jump in the pool as soon as I can find the water on Mario? I mean, Mario jump to Mars!
OWWWWWWWWWWW I JUST GOT A CUT ON MY BUTT. Oh wait, that’s always been there.
I gave a blind kid a pistol and said it was a hairdryer.