What is a cannibal's favorite place to go? An orphanage. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why do animals in polar regions have thick fur? Because they don't have a barber! 🤣 🤣 🤣
POV there’s a school shooting.
American: First time, European?
European: Yeah, you American?
American: No, not my first time.
I was thinking about jelly this morning. It reminded me to take out the trash.
I was at school today, and one of my friends said after a test, "Man, that was hard." After that, I started laughing and I said, "That's what she said."
"Texas be like it's cold over here over here."
Your mom's so fat, she annexed Crimea!
Your mom is so fat she was the reason why the Titanic crashed.
What does a pig call its dad... mom? 😂
Texas be like, "We vote to freeze ourselves!"
Texas be like everything is bigger here: guns and winter storms!
RYAN MY BELOVED SON WHERE ARE YOU?
Why is the USA bad at Clash Royale? 'Cause they already lost two towers.
What do you call an elite bungee jumper? An emo kid.
I called the suicide hotline, and he suggested I draw on myself to distract myself.
I replied I'd get ink poisoning.
Wouldn't recommend, the police came.
"Trust falling" with a bridge is more trustworthy than me.
Dad: I'll pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie.
Next day:
Dad: Son, what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen?
Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life, gosh, Dad, you're embarrassing.
The dad sulked for 3 whole years.
Proof that words really can hurt.
NASA stands for "Nobody Already Seen Astronauts."
Why did NASA have to go to space? Because space is lonely.
An apple and an emo kid fell from a tree, which one hit the ground?
The apple, because the rope caught the emo kid.
