Worst Jokes Ever
Why does Tesco like midgets?
Every little helps.
Why can orphans not play baseball? They can't hit a home run.
An orphan was shocked, he called the ambulance. If he forgot he's suicidal, he quickly hung up.
Are you a knife?
Because I want to deep throat you.
What were Steven Hawking’s last words?
ERROR 101.
What did one butt say to the other?
Something brown is slithering down.
An Asian man walks into a bar in Australia. The bartender says to him “why are you here? Get back in that wing wong country.”
The Asian man says “I’m here traveling and now I’m gonna attack you with my 40 gallons of fried rice I’ve had in my pocket since wa dinowar wages. #wingwong”
What does an Asian doorbell sound like?
"Wing wong wung wang, wong wang wing wong!"
Why don’t Asians use phones?
Cuz they wing da wrong number!!!
Why is falone mentally disabled?
Who knows, and quite frankly, who cares?
Why did the moderator of worstjokesever.com die?
He had a heart attack because he was a fat loser.
Why did Mozart hate all of his chickens?
When he asked them who the best composer was, they all replied, “Bach, Bach, Bach.”
What do you call a flat emo?
A cutting board.
My friend and I got into a fight. I looked straight forward and said, "Look me in my eyes!"
Ever looked at a cemetery and thought, wow, Heaven and Hell must be crowded?
Patient: Sorry I'm so nervous, this is my first surgery.
Doctor: Oh, don't worry, mine too!
Person: "Sorry to bother you, but what's the quickest way to get to the hospital?"
Stranger: "Oh, just go stand in the middle of the road!"
What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
Reality.
Yo mama so fat, she fell off both sides of the bed!
How do you start a rave in Ethiopia?
You put food on the ceiling and they start jumping.