Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

A guy asked me what I do for a living.

Now I'm not old enough to get a job, so I said nothing. He asked me again, so I said, "Your wife!" The guy goes to slap me, but his wife is standing right there. She instead slapped me and said, "You swore not to tell!"

"Confucius say, man who has mosquito on balls truly understands nonviolence."

A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.

The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

A man comes to an assassin who charges $1000 per shot. He tells the assassin, "My wife's been cheating on me. I want you to shoot her in the head and shoot the guy in the dick." When they arrive, they wait. The man asks why he hasn't taken the shot. The assassin says, "I know how I can save you $1000."