Worst Jokes Ever
What do strippers and butter have in common?
Both spread for bread.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
What do nail polish and panties have in common?
Both come off with alcohol.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Fuck.
Fuck who?
Fuck off!
Why did the football player go to the bank?
To get his quarter back.
What is better, autism or Down syndrome?
Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.
Yo mama so fat, she stepped on the scale and it said a.k.a. "error."
My boyfriend always likes when I wear my fishnet sleeves. He says it looks great on me, but he doesn’t know that my skin is covered with scars... no one does. No one questions why I wear them everyday. I hope it stays like that because I can’t deal with my mom finding out that I still hurt myself.
Are you a razor? 'Cause you make me red.
Are you a mental hospital? Cause I need to be in you.
Vegan is actually an old Indian word for "bad hunter."
I just prevented a 10-year-old from getting assaulted.
Nothing much, I just decided to go home.
What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?
They usually don’t live to tell the tale.
What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?
"Hi, nice to meet you."
It's telling that Ye gets more offended when he's called a gayfish than a Nazi.
It's no surprise Donald Trump moved to Florida. That's where the oranges are.
Stephen Hawking is better than NASA. They study black holes that are 8 billion years old, while he was down here on Earth staring at 14-year-old black holes. 😈😈😈
💪 💪 🏋️♂️ What do you get when you cross a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a bukkake slut, and a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a sex worker?
Cum Junkie.
How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?