Worst Jokes Ever
Where do surfers go to school?
Boarding school.
If you're cleaning a vacuum, aren't you the vacuum cleaner?
If you're waiting for a waiter at a restaurant, aren't you the waiter?
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have nobody to call "daddy."
Your mum went to the dentist so she could install Bluetooth.
I got kicked out of a library today because I put a book about women's rights in the fantasy section.
What do you call a sneaky child molester?
Incogpedo.
Roses are red, violets are blue, but at least a dumptruck isn't as ugly as you.
What do you call terrorists in a wheelchair?
An RCXD.
People have been telling me that you can get things for free now.
The other day I saw a sign saying "FREE PALESTINE."
Why do you not play with a cheetah? Because they cheat!
Why do rapists and pedophiles never win a race?
Because they always like to come in a little behind.
Isn't having depersonalization mean that you like the animatronics off of FNAF/Five Nights at Freddy's?
(If you don't know what depersonalization is, look it up.)
Why do Jedis stay single?
Because they use "divorce" (the Force).
May divorce be with you!
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says: "I'll have some H2O."
The second one says: "I'll have some H2O, too." And then he died.
What is Johnny Depp's new legal name?
Johnny in debt.
It's important to wash your sex toys.
That's why priests invented baptism.
I wanted to do something nice for my uncle, so I cleaned out the nice vase that was given at grandma's funeral. It had so much sand, I'm glad to help.
Why does Batman cover half of his face? To let the police know that he's white.
People go to places to see Harry Potter live, but you can just go to the abortion place and see something disappear.