70+ Neither Jokes

What do blind kids and orphans have in common? Neither of them can see their parents.

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an airplane landing strip? Don't know, neither did my dad.

What starts with M and ends with arriage?

Miscarriage. Now we all know that joke never gets old, and you know what?

Neither does the child.

What do a pedophile and a clock have in common? Neither of them go past 12.

Ya ever think about the twin towers plan?

Me neither. It all came crashing down.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano?

Neither has he.

An ugly, arrogant woman walked into a store with her 2 kids, yelling at them.

The store clerk pleasantly said, "Good morning ma'am and welcome. Nice children, are they twins?"

The ugly woman stopped yelling and said, "Hell no they are not, one is 9 and the other is 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just bloody stupid?"

The clerk replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid ma'am, I just can't believe someone would screw you twice."

Have you ever tried North Korean food?

Neither have the North Koreans.

Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she. Did you see that one coming? Neither did she.

(She's blind and deaf)

What do Paul Walker and I have in common? Neither of us have seen Fast and the Furious 7.

Fortnite is like America... At one time it was good and free. Now it's neither.

Have you walked into Stephen Hawking's house?

Oh, neither did he.

What starts with M and ends with carriage?

This joke never gets old, but then again neither does the baby.

Kenny can't find a girlfriend because neither of his sisters can fuck as good as his mom could.

In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common?

They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.