New Name Jokes - Page 53 - Worst Jokes Ever

Name something you practiced kissing on as a kid.

Sister. SWEET HOME ALABAMA!

Am I the only one who gives people in the neighborhood names they don't know they have? Like "Blue truck dude", "Loud dog guy", "Nice old lady with the rose bushes", "That slut across the street."

There are 5 cows in a field. One of them is the mom, the rest are kids. One of the kids walked up to the mom and asked, "Why am I named Daisy?" and then a daisy fell on her head.

The second cow came up to the mom and asked, "Why am I named Rose?" and then a rose fell on her head. Then the 3rd cow said, "Why am I named Violet?" then a violet fell on her head. Then the 4th cow walked up and said, "Merrrbere." Then the mom said, "Shutup, cinder block!"

What place is Flo Rida from? Florida.

I will call my kid Monday, because whenever I see him, I feel disappointment.

Bippity Boppity Bill Cosby!

Girl 1: Dad, why is my name Rose?

Dad: Because a rose landed on your head.

Girl 2: Hey, Dad, why is my name Daisy?

Dad: Because a daisy landed on your head.

Boy: Hitddvjkyrefbhhhrurrrr!

Dad: Oh, hey Brick!

What did the paintings name their daughter?

Palette.

Why is he called Ben 10? Because he is ten in long.

What do you call Mexicans in a band trying to be a white band?

"Juan Direction."

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in front of a door?

A: Mat.

Why are hill billies so weird? Because their name is Billy.

How do Asian people name their children?

They throw a pan down the stairs.

What would your name be? Msg it to @chelsearosegraham.

I named my dog 5-Miles, so now I tell people, "I walk 5-Miles every day."

My friends and I were talking about this really ugly girl at our school. For some reason, she had the same name as me.

Hey dad, I'm hungry!

Hi hungry, I'm dad. Why did you name me this way, why why why?

I used to date a girl named Ruth, but she broke up with me and now I am ruthless.

A man had moved to a new country with his dog and with basic understanding of the language. One day he heard people talking about a place for dogs, so he took his dog there, telling them he wanted his dog to be groomed.

The man behind the counter responded with "yes happy dog, come back in little hours." So the man left and came back a couple hours later. When he asked about his dog, he was given a box of jerky. He found out "Happy Dog" was the name of the place where dogs become food.