My jokes

Lenda: Hey, can you help me with my homework, please?!

Genda: Okay, and if I do, you won't make a fuss about it!

Lenda: I'll try!

3 mins later.

Genda: THAT IS NOT THE RIGHT ANSWER!

Lenda: Then what is 90 million?

Genda: WHA WHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lenda mocking her: WHA OH YEAH YOU ARE A TERRIBLE TUTOR!!!!!!!!

4 mins later.

Genda: What is the capitol of watchington?

Lenda: Uh.....Idaho!

Genda being sarcastic: Yes...it is not the capitol of watchington...BECAUSE IT IS A STATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lenda: Oh, you mean Iowa!

Genda: UHHHHHHHHHHHH CUSS WORD!!!!!!!!!!

Lenda: U can't help that I'm the smart one...okay sweetie now you go be dumb and I go be smart! LATER SISTER! Oh wait, can you help me with my homework?

Genda: NO! You the smart one so you do it!

Three friends were stuck in the desert. They were struggling and trying to find food when they found a magical lamp. They rubbed it and out came a genie, and the genie says, "Each of you friends get to have one wish." So the first friend said, "I wish to go home," same as the second one. The third friend said, "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were with me!"

When I was in high school, me and my friends would play with this girl who had Down syndrome.

We would get into a circle around her and say, "Nightmare, nightmare!"

Why did my dad leave me? Because I was a disappointment.

I always talk to my taco before I eat it.

One time it said it was having a bad day and I asked what's wrong. He said I don't want to taco 'bout it!

My life, lmao.

Who the f**k disliked my "yo mama" jokes? Comment now, b*tch!

My girlfriend broke up with me because I have a small dick. Too bad for her, because I give good sex.

I impaled my son with a pitchfork...

He looks very sharp.

My sister's boyfriend is mad because I fucked his girl.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

My penis.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream?

He got hit by a bus.

I was talking to my old friend. They said, "We should hang out more!"

I said, "You mean we should ketchup?"

My life...

Dam, my balls itch like hell.

Me: I’m going to get burrito 🌯

Friend: You can have my burrito baby.

Gay.

Friend: *begins to moan*

Me: Finna hang up.

Watching porn.

Watching porn blow my dick like a basset horn.

Wanna hear a mean joke?

My life.

So, I got my blind friend a Big Mac for his birthday. A week later, he walked up to me and said,

"Damn, that was the most violent book I've ever read."

A hitman walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "I'm here to assassinate John Tucker." The bartender replies, "He’s in the restroom." The hitman goes inside the restroom and comes out after 1 hour.

The bartender asks him, "Did you kill him?" The hitman replies with a sad face, “I asked him any last wishes and the guy asked me to allow him to finish his shit as he is half way in passing his stools, so I gave him my word that I would wait and so I waited for an hour, and when I asked him what’s taking him so long, he says he will not be able to finish because he is just getting started.”