My jokes
What’s the difference between a pile of babies and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
Roses are red, violets are blue, My heart is dead, I’m such a fool.
I love my new phone.
I love my family.
I lost my job at a research facility. The people were too chill for me.
My acquaintance, William.
My mental health.
Roses are red, I failed my test, All because of Hugh and his incest.
When I nailed the quiz, my teacher wasn't very happy. I wasn't either with all those paper cuts.
Oof.
My parents told me that when they had sex, it was absolutely shambles.
Thankfully, it turned out that they were real balls.
You are about to hear the funniest joke ever.
My life.
My friend dreamed of being a porno star.
He did it for 3 months and decided it was not for him.
The next job he got was pumping petrol. Halfway through filling up, he pulled the hose out and started spraying all over the car!
Someone is adding dirt to my garden!
The plot thickens!
Someone asked me if I was a good sleeper. I told them I'm so good that I can do it with my eyes closed.
I'll remember my last words... "Sorry, I'm not sorry!"
I would tell you a story of my dad... If I knew who he was.
Me, holding a baby: "Oh my God, it's so cute!"
Also me: "Throw it."
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
MY NAME IS JEFFFFFFFF!
My diet:
Make all of my friends cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look...