My jokes

This is an inside joke for my friend Caiden...

"Hey, where’d you get that paint from?" "Ha! Paint!"

I accidentally hit an orphan with my car, but I was not worried because he couldn’t tell his parents.

Knock knock. Who's there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald my Halloween candy and now it's stuck in my throat!

My dustbin's absolutely full of toadstools!

How do you know it's full?

Because there's not mushroom inside.

Hahahahahahhah my nan died :)

I told my Mum, "Will you remember me in 6 minutes, 6 hours, 6 years?"

She said, "Yes."

"Knock knock."

I said, "My mum, who's there? You didn’t remember me!"

My friend told me she had a good joke and it beat all mine. I said, "Haha, that is funny!"

I called my dog 5 miles.

Today, I fawn over my miles.

The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.

I tripped over my wife’s bra. It was a booby trap!

My father told me to always carry a women's bag, but I don't know why he called the cops on me when I helped Mom's bag when we went parachuting. :(

Roblox Brookhaven be like:

"ABC if you wanna be adopted."

"ABC if you wanna be my friend."

"ABC if you wanna be a banker."

"ABC if you wanna rob the bank."

"ABC if you wanna date."

"ABC if you wanna sex."

My wife asked me to please quit singing "Wonderwall" in the shower.

I said, "Maybe."

My friend said, "Where is the trash?" I said, "Look in the mirror, there is the trash."

My grandma said, "Hey, you want a Butterfinger cause I do?"

Me: Grandpa's in the kitchen if you want a finger.

My penis is so polite. It stands up so girls can sit down.

Which way is quicker to die? Noose or slitting my throat?

Have anyone seen my balls? I can't find them on my chest.

Hey! My balls are on your thing!

What goes up but never goes down?

My grades.

(I wish)

My mate Noha.