My jokes

I'd like to relish the fact that you've mustered up the courage to ketchup to my level.

They laughed at my crayon drawing.

I laughed at their chalk outline.

Engineer: I know engineering, and my gut instinct tells me to fix it!

Biologist: I know biology, and your gut instinct is full of shit.

Here’s my pun.

Yup literally nothing... jeez this was pretty plain.

I’m giving in my two week resignation to life... it’s not you ... it’s me!!!

My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.

But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.

Hi, my name is Bob.

Follow me on Instagram @v2good.at.fortnite and @v2good.at.edits for a surprise.

Btw, you have to like all my posts :)

I am Wayde, I like ranga balls, please cum in my ass.

I was talking to a beaver about my life. I don't think he really gave a dam about it at all.

My life is a joke.

My dad always told me I should sing tenor. Ten or twelve miles away.

I'll never forget how my grandmother died. "This lemonade tastes like bleach..."

I told my mother I'm a sexy cunt. She said, "No, you got cancer, you twat."

My mother said I'm sexy. I said no, I have cancer.

Me: Hey dad, I'm in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal!

Dad: Hi in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal! I'm dad!

My wife's dyslexic, but hey, nobody's perfect.

My friend was a victim of a school shooting once, but he couldn't tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his AR.

I like my humor like my people. Well done.

Q: What's 8 inches and makes my wife scream when I put it in her mouth?

A: Her dead fetus.