My jokes
Who wants a picture of my pp?
What weighs 70 pounds and doesn't like sex?
The 6-year-old in the trunk of my car.
Can I put my balls in your jaw <3?
The day I saw people asking Lebron James whether he liked to play basketball, my thoughts be like: wait, so Lebron James is gay cuz he likes to play with them balls.
My name is Ethan, and I don't find this funny.
Guys, can we change pride month to another month, please? My birthday is in June, and I'm not gay, and my friends keep making fun of me. I think we should change it to March because my brother's birthday is in March, and that'd be funny.
"Jimmy Jimmy, Yes Papa,"
"Give away my Money, No Papa,"
"Telling Lies, OK, Ima Check my Bank Account."
El/11: Ego, My Lego.
People on the Titanic were cracking up at my jokes, so did the Titanic. No, really, the Titanic cracked in half!
Things I would’ve missed if my suicide attempt didn’t fail in 2020.
My attempt in 2021.
And my attempt this year.
Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.
Bill Cosby on rape: "But, I heard, 'my body, my choice.'"
Girl, come here, my parents aren't home.
Orphan: Mine are never.
I broke my ankles so hard I had to walk uphill both ways.
I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.
I needn't have bothered.
The next day, it was smeared all over my face.
I lost my job by giving up my seat to someone.
I didn't know you're not supposed to do that if you're a bus driver!
I asked my daddy what sex was. He said, "Wanna cum and try it?"
Yo mama so dumb, when I told her my blind friend couldn’t see, she said, “Open yo eyes!”
Yo mama so dumb, when I told her my friend was mute she said, “Can't you unmute her?”
Your hairline and my car go Lighting McQueen speed because he never came back with the milk.