Must Jokes

if mistakes make people human than your parents must have been alligators before you were born

Father : "That's great son. Who is she?"

Son: "It's Tina, the neighbor's daughter".

Father : "Ohhh I wish you hadn't said that.I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.Tina is actually your sister."

The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later

Son : "Daddy, I fell in love again and she is even hotter!"

Father : "That's great son. Who is she?"

Son: "It's Peny, the other neighbor's daughter."

Father : "Ohhhh I wish you hadn't said that. Peny is also your sister."

This went on couple of times and the son was so mad,he went straight to his mother crying.

Son : "Mum I am so mad at dad ! I fell in love with six girls but I can't date any of them because daddy is their father!"

The mother hugs him affectionately and says:

"My love, you can date whoever you want. Don't listen to him. He is not your Father."!!!

At the resturant, the waitress starts flirting with me. "She must have COVID," my wife said. "Why?" I asked. "Cuz she clearly has no taste." She responded.

Spongebob is yellow, and he can't drive.

Must be Asian.

Once there were twins, Mark and Michael, Mark was the owner of a old boat. It so happened that Michael's wife died the same day that Mark's boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Mark and mistook him for Michael. She said, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible. "Mark, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said, "Heck no. In fact, I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing right from the beginning. Her bottom was all shrivelled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always losing her water; she had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The fools tried to get in her all at once and she split right up the middle!" The old lady fainted. 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂

all orphans must be gay because they are not home o fobic

"Sir, in court, all your answers must be oral, okay?"

"Ok."

"What town did you grow up in?"

"Oral."

My nan must really love the quiet game shes been playing it for ages

Sister: your adopted

Me: at least they wanted me, they must feel terribly bad cuz they had to keep you :(

Stephen hawking must have got a MacBook Pro. End of battery

I was shopping for a halloween costume, but once we got to the ghost section all of the costumes were out of stock! It turned out Pristiano Penaldo was buying them all! I came up to him and asked why he was doing this and he said: I’m sorry, but it’s match day, I must be a ghost 👻👻

School teacher: "Hey kid. why don't you just go home to your family?" Orphan: "My family never came back for me" School teacher: "Your daddy must of really needed that milk"

Trump, Must I say more?

So a woman gets into a car accident and is in the hospital and the doctor goes on to tell the man what is going on; Doctor: "so your wife she is paralyzed from the neck down" and as the doctor goes he says all the things the man must do for her like feed her, dress her, etc. Then the man says " why, WHY ME!" Then the doctor leans over and whispers in the mans ear and says " I'm just fuckin with u she's DEAD!"

Towing ropes can't be learned They must be taut.

doctors in the middle ages, Plague doctor: "i must have some herbs to block out bad air" docters now: "God, wtf were we doing back then"

My bother apparently has this thing called "asthma", anyways I took his vape away today and he was lying on the floor gasping for air lol. He must really be addicted to it.