Music jokes
Why is Jesus in pieces?
Because a one man band is Nine Inch Nails.
What do you call a white guy who can actually dance? Jewish.
What's the difference between Elton John and rapboat?
Elton is talented, rich, and openly gay. Rapboat got fuck all talent, no money, and is not out of the closet yet.
Q: What did the kid say to the emo kid?
A: Don't leave me hanging!
What is the best Christmas present ever? A broken drum! You just can't beat it!
What do you call an angry reindeer? RUDE-olph!
What is Santa's favorite breakfast? Snowflakes!
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis!
I walked up to a cat and started to sing a song. The cat said, "HECK NO!" then ran off. I follow it while still singing "BABY COME HOME TO ME!!"
It did not rain very often when Chuck Norris was a kid.
Why?
Because his favorite childhood song was "Rain Rain Go Away."
Who dislikes my freestyle?
Only one band is capable of affording the insurance on supercars. UB40!
Mariah Carey is a more legit rapper than rapboat.
Kid: "Mom, I had a scary dream. Can I come sleep with you and dad?"
Mom: "Sure, sweetie, sleep in the middle."
Kid: "Dad, can you get the remote out of my back?"
Dad: "That isn't the remote."
*Weird background music*
What did the grape say to the rapper?
"You're so VINE, you must be on the JUICE!"
Q. What's Jeffery Dahmer's favorite song?
A. "Pieces of You."
What do you call a rapper who's always COLD?
MC Freezer.
What do you call a rapper who's always sleepy?
NAP-TAIN
What's white and comes in little cans?
Michael Jackson.
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
A rhyme scheme that's all about the Benjamins!
Juice WRLD died a legend. Making these jokes won't get you anywhere. Grow up.
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
DJ Croos joke.