Mum jokes
I have a daughter; she’s a fan. Her name is Penny. Fan she was born on the mountain Pen y Fan. I adopted her because her mum fell off the cliff after birthing Penny. It doesn’t matter, really; Penny’s mum wasn’t a big fan of her anyway.
My mum.
Your mum is so fat that when she looks in the mirror, the mirror cracked!
Why did the beans fuck the mum to make bouncing beans?
Why can’t someone say "ur mums gay" to an orphan? Because he doesn’t have a mum.
Your mum!
Ur mum smells like shit, yeah, so she sucks a man off and washing machine. Yo, don’t at me, yeah, you chicken breath.
Dog toys are getting out of control.
My mum's dog has a round bison bone.
Looks like he was chewing on Tracy Latimer's hip or something.
Go to the replies, look at the top and it will say "in your mum."
Your forehead is so big your mum spent an extra hour in the birth delivery room.
Your mum... payed other people to take you!!!!
The Golden State? More like your mum's state...
Beans, your mum is fat!
Karens yell, I scream, my mum fucks me.
If you get an apple a day, what does it give you?
Worms and rotten fruit.
Your mum is so fat, when the doctors did her x-ray, the doctor said to her, "I want your x-ray, not an elephant's x-ray!"
After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.
During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."
Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"
Your mum. That's all I need to say.
Carys’s mum has chemo.
Why did ze cow cross the road?
yo watch his mum getting butchered she was an udder failure.