What did mommy spider say to baby spider?
You spend too much time on the web.
Much Jokes
What does Cangaball do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
Trump cheated so much he cheated himself out of an election!
If God didn’t mean for us to have sex with 11-year-old girls, why did he make them so sexy and so much physically weaker?
The view is so much better without those twins covering the city.
Well, that was a blow up!
I know why Stephen Hawking loves Transformers so much now.
Autobots, "Roll Out!"
A Scotsman at the hairdresser: "How much is a haircut?"
"Six pounds."
"And shaving?"
"Three pounds."
"Good, then shave my head."
If at first you don't succeed, oh well, so much for skydiving.
22. Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
24. When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.
31. My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. So I unplugged his life support.
What do a bungee jump and a hooker have in common?
They’re both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you’re pretty much screwed.
Why do basketball players love cookies so much?
Because they can dunk them!
Q: Why do I like bone jokes so much?
A: Because they are humerus.
What is the difference between a Libertarian and a dumb polack?
Not much difference.
I was sitting in class, and the teacher said he wasn't disappointed in me and my best friend, but not so much in me.
I looked at my best friend and said, "I'm a disappointment to the teacher, too."
I love bread so much that I might join a bread cult.
One person said you are much more beautiful than Cinderella. The next day, you're in court and Cinderella is the witness.
(P.S. she was born to be a drama queen.)
How much does a hipster weigh?
About an Instagram.
The extra detention didn't do much, but the extra chromosome definitely did.
My grandfather said that ppl rely on technology too much these days, so I thought about what he said and decided to unplug his life support.
My grandpa said this generation relies too much on tech, so I unplugged his life support.
