Much jokes
You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll.
What do you call a fat Chinese person that talks way too much? Panda Express.
When Jim was playing on his phone, my grandfather told him, "You use way too much technology!" Jim then said, "No, YOU use too much technology!" and then Jim disconnected his grandfather’s life support.
When I'm peeing in a toilet I don't pee directly into the water. I pee on the curved part of the bowl beside the water because I figure it splashes less, but when you're peeing that close to the edge, the sporadic tiny offshoots of pee become a greater threat.
I'm not sure if the accumulation of these offshoots is greater than the potential splashback from peeing mid-bowl. It's possible that I'm thinking about this too much, but it's also possible that I'm not thinking about this enough.
Kid: How much do you get paid?
Teacher: Minimum wage.
BRO ASTRO NOVALITE IS A SCARDEY CAT, SO MUCH HE IS SCARED OF DANDY, THAT HE'S AFRAID TO ASK HIM TO BE HIS FRIEND OR HIS SECRET LOVER, LIKEEEE BRUHHHHH IT'S NOT THAT TOUGH BRO, LIKE GET OVER IT
This is about Gwen.
I don't know her, but people are just causing too much drama over one person who never said one thing to them.
How much you wanna bet you will not repeat my name out loud (at school/work)?
Attention to everyone, I'm not going to be on for 2 weeks because I was in a bike accident, or more like a motorcycle accident. I was ran off the road when my 16 year old brother was taking me for a ride. Now I can't use my legs cause, well, you know. I will be taking a break because I don't want to move my legs that much.
According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form contains only four lines:
1. What was your income for the year?
2. What were your expenses?
3. How much have you left?
4. Send it in.
My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. So I unplugged his life support.
Why can't I drink tea??
Because I laugh too much. TEEEEEHEHEEE
I hate "the woke" so much, I got mad when my mom said I "woke" up late for school.
There are three people on the steps of Heaven. God tells them all he is having a good day and if they make him laugh by telling him how they died, he will let them in.
The first one said, "I just finished a long day of work and I get home, and right as I stepped in, I knew my wife was cheating on me. I searched everywhere and I couldn’t find anybody, so I got a drink and went to the balcony, and then I saw him, hanging off the ledge of the balcony. I kicked his hands, but he wouldn’t fall, so I threw a Refrigerator at him, and I fell with the Refrigerator."
God busted out laughing and let him in.
The next person walked up and God told him the same thing he told the other person. God told him that he didn’t think that he could make him laugh more than the first person. The second guy said, "So get this, I’m a window washer on the 8th floor. I’m washing the windows like normal, and this enraged psychopath walks up and starts kicking my hands, and then he throws a refrigerator at me and I die."
God bursts out laughing so much to where he falls off his chair, and he lets the guy through. The next guy comes up and God tells him the same thing he told the last two people, and he tells him that there is no way that he can make him laugh more than the other two did. So he starts talking. "So get this, I’m in a refrigerator..."
My friend asked me:
Friend: "How much is your body worth?"
Me: "1 million."
Friend: "1 million dollars?!"
Me: "No. 1 million kilograms."
Friend: "Oh."
How much do the bones in your body weigh? A skele-ton!
How much context, pecker? You Press context categoria, go Discord.
Drink tea with friend game night.
What do you call a person without a nose and who doesn't know much?
Nose-less.
I like school.
My grandfather said that ppl rely on technology too much these days, so I thought about what he said and decided to unplug his life support.
Why is it that orphans love Frisbees so much?
Because they return eventually.