Mortality

Mortality Jokes

"I have good and bad news," the doctor said to his patient.

"Give me the good news first," the patient said.

"Your test results are back," the doctor said, "and you have only two days to live."

"That's the good news?" the patient exclaimed. "What's the bad news?"

"I've been trying to reach you for two days."

Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."

*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"

If you have an overdose on a drug and die, then half of the least dose would be a lifetime supply.

I don’t know why I go to the gym. Being healthy is dying as fast as possible, and I really want to speed that shit up.