This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
My Xbox has been acting up lately...
So I painted it black to make it run faster
*Hears the news about Sandy Hook* Person 1:God,I can only imagine what was going through those kids heads in the last moments of their lives... Person 2:Probably Bullets Person 1:OMG!!Can you even think of what their parents are going through?! Person 2:Probably Coffin Brochures Person 1:.... Person 2:Its called dark humor.Dark humor is like food,not everyone gets it.
Someone raped my ear, now I have hearing aids
All jokes are funny with the correct delivery . Except for abortion jokes, there is no delivery.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
A guy walks into a magical forest looking to cut down a tree. The best one he can find is a magical talking tree. He holds his axe up ready to slice and begins to swing when the tree says " Stop ye Im a magical tree you can't cut me." "I'm a magical tree!" the man mocks then as he goes to swing the axe he says,"you may be a magical tree... But you will dialog!"
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
A man was mowing his lawn when blue and reg stuff came out instead of grass. Next thing he knew a smurf was on his shoulder asking if he’s seen his friend.
Last time i talked to my girlfriend, she was yelling at me to put the hammer down.
What do you do when your dish washer stops working
Hit your wife harder
What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?
Are you ready kids?
A family of 3, a dad, a mom, and a 12 year old son are driving in the car when the dad says, “How about we play a little game of two truths and a lie. It’ll be fun.” “Ok,” the mom and son reply happily. “Let me start,” says the son. “Ok, go ahead,” replies the mom. “I hate video games, I hate school, and I love junk food,” says the son. “Ooh ooh! You do love junk food, you do hate school, and you don’t hate video games.” Says the mom. “Your right!” He replies. “I’ll go next,” says the dad. I love your mom, you’re adopted, and my dad almost died in WWII.” “Hmm... Your dad did not almost die in WWII, obviously I’m not adopted, and you do love my mom.” Says the son. “The lie isn’t that your adopted.” Says the dad.
my happiest moment in life was getting a positive grade on my h.i.v test w/out studying
Why Did The Columbine High School Basketball Team Lose The Big Game? Because They Lost Their Two Best Shooters...
How many babies do you need to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What do most 50-year-old men put inside there cars
Children
What's worse than waking up with a penis drawn on your face?
Finding out it was traced
I had a huge crush on this girl when I was eight, one recess we met together on the playground and she brought me to the corner of the playground, that was my first kiss and from there it got serious. I told my parents a week later and they freaked out, called the police and they aressted my crush. I miss Mrs. Johnson
What did Freddie Mercury use to improve his hearing?
Hearing AIDS
