Morbid jokes
Solve this equation: a gay boy + a whole lot of drugs = A hyped up f'ing machine.
Why did Jimmy throw the clock out the window? Because it reminded him of Arnold Clock, the man who knife-raped his wife.
Incest is wincest.
My family is like Donkey Kong: a real pain in the ass.
My best friend looked at my arms and said, "Stop, sh*t, it's bad," then turns right around and says, "You look like a tiger."
So from here on out I am now Finn, the self-harming tiger.
How do you get 100 dead babies into a tub? Put them in the blender.
How do you get them out of the tub? Give mexicans tortilla chips and tell them theres salsa in the tub.
How many police officers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just beat the room for being black.
What's great about having sex with twenty-eight year olds?
There's ate of them.
What’s the difference between a bullet and a prostitute? They both burst a barrel.
You're dead inside.
(Stabs him 23 times)
Do you know who didn't graduate high school this year?
The Parkland kids.
Why were the Twin Towers sad?
They ordered Dominos and got Jets.
I love going to Hooters and looking at the menu... If you know what I mean;)
Loser.
Your family.
What's the difference between a pope/preacher and acne?
Acne comes on your face when you're 13.
I heard they're making a film about Jimmy Savile, it's a very touchy subject.
I heard the film about is so boring it puts you to sleep.
Two nuns in a bath.
My dad died lol.
So um uh I like people who like people who like people.