Morbid jokes
Hi, I'm new here and I'm 11. I'm just bored and want a girlfriend.
Does anyone have Snapchat or Twitter? I can show you what I look like ;)
What do you call six gay men at war? Rainbow Six Siege.
Did you know Cobain had dandruff? Yep. They found his head and shoulders all over the back of his couch.
Humans and sharks have something in common: the great ones are always white.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and acne? Acne doesn't come on a 5-year-old's face.
Did you know there was a record for the quickest time to finish a story? The day it was set was 9/11. 99 stories in .4 seconds.
What's a kidnapper's favorite shoes?
White vans.
I'm a lady, so I'm a man.
Hey Gwen.
What was Hitler's lucky number?
Nein.
I just wanted to write something random.
And now my wife is dead.
What is a cannibal's favorite drink?
Coffee.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology. I call him a hypocrite and unplug his life support. 😄😆🔥👍
The cemetery is so overcrowded.
People are just dying to get in.
Roses are red, violets are violet.
My grandad died in 9/11. He was a good pilot.
What if little Johnny was doing drugs?
"Johnny, Johnny?"
"Yes, Papa?"
"Eating sugar?"
"No, Papa..."
People in plays say that everyone's life is a drama, but mine's a tragedy.
Did you hear about the school shooting joke? Well, I won't tell you it's aimed at a younger audience.
Jon said: What do you call a pregnant woman?
Mike said: I don’t know, what?
Jon said: Kinder surprise.