Mom jokes

My mom's name is Angel, and she is nothing like one!

Especially in bed...

I used to look up to my mom, but now that I am 12, I look down on her.

Your mom should show you your real home. The trash!

If death was an option for a look, you could be the first.

Ur mom gei.

Guess what? If your mom ever wants to have sex with you, tell her to make another.

I sucked your mom's anus.

There were 5 cows on a farm, one mom and 4 calves.

The first calf goes up to the mom and says, "Momma, why is my name Rose?"

The mother cow replies, "Well sweetie, when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head."

The second calf walks up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Lily?", to which the mom replies "Well honey, when you were born, a single lily petal fell on your head."

The third calf walks up, but before it can get a word out, the fourth calf screams at the top of its lungs. The mother cow yells, "Shut up, Cinderblock!"

Your mom... OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

What do you call a cow with 2 legs?

Your fat ass mom.

A mom says to her son: "Hey, can you wave to that deaf kid over there?"

The son: "I don't know, can I?"

The mom: "May you?"

The son: "No, I don't have any arms!"

Kariana: Dad and mom, what is this bullshit?

Treon: How did you find that?!

Kariana: It was under the cabinet where you told me to put the streamers. I found these under the cabinet, did she have another sister you didn't tell me about? Now tell the truth, or else!

Petina: Now what have we told you about going into things that are not yours!

Kariana: I just told you to say the fricking truth, now who is Faineni? Where is she? Who is she? What is her date of birth? Why do I have her bra under here and why....IS IT UNDER THE FRICKING CABINET!!!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!

Treon: We can't!

Kariana: BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!

How old is uuuuuurrrr mom?

Five.

Cringe.... I know that was a crap joke... not even a joke.

LBB- me and Shrek built a theme park for you mummy and it’s called Dummy pee pee poo poo doo doo land because Shrek likes to poop.

Shrek- Should I pull the trap?

*LBB’s mom walks into the trap*

LBB and Shrek- surprise we’re mailing you to Peepoo Peepoo AB

Yo mama is so stupid it takes her an hour to cook minute rice.

Your mom's so fat, when she entered a fat contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"

I love your mom and dad's joke! They made it together and called it your name.

I fucked the shit outta of my friend's mom with my 8 inch dick (Adrian). PS. Sorry, Adrian!

Pierre Poilievre has lost the government position he had for 20 years.

Bet he wishes his mom HAD used that coat hanger.

Your hairline is so ugly it looks worse than your mom's.

Your mom is so fat the space shuttle can see her from 10,000 miles away.