Mom jokes
Wanna hear a joke?
YOUR MOM!
OHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Teacher: Where were you born?
Student: The highway.
Teacher: What do you mean?
Student: I don't know, my mom says that's where all the accidents happen.
Mom: I'm going to the shop. If someone is at the door, don't open it.
Me: Ok.
*Ring*
Me: Opens the door.
Oh sh*t!
Mom: Gets flip flop.
Your mom and your dad.
What happened when a kid bullied an orphan?
The orphan said, "I’m going to tell my mom!"
Bully: "I wanna see your mom!"
Narrator: At that moment, he knew he messed up.
This was my friend's joke he wanted me to post;)
When you're at your friend's house and her mom starts yelling at you
Tell an orphan "your mom", but then remember he doesn't have one.
Why were you born?
Because I asked out your mom on accident.
Son, why do I not have an Easter basket?
Mom, you're 23, you don't need one. Ends calls, child support.
My mom was 19 when she was pregnant with me, My mom was 39 when she was pregnant by me!!!
Mom! Mom! The class called me an orphan.
Sike, I lied, your mom is a guy!
Your mom is so fat, they asked if she was a sumo wrestler.
My dad told me a story today. His mom, my grandma, said if a bird gets in your house, someone will die.
That day, a hummingbird got in his UPS truck, and that’s the day he found out that my grandma had cancer. 😭😭😭😭😭 6 weeks later, she died. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
But her ass was lookin' good all up in those mom jeans!
Little Susie had gotten her first period. She told her mom, and they bought pads.
The next month, Susie's mom asked if she had her second one. Suzie said no, and her mom fainted!
What's the difference between a hoe and a prostitute?
One is a tool. The other is your mom.
I asked my mom where babies come from. She said I came from the adoption center.
My aunt visited and saw all of the stuff around the house my mom had kept over the years and said, "If you have something that no one likes, and it only makes people upset, or it's useless, throw it away."
The next time my aunt visited, she said, "Where is your daughter?"
My mom said, "I took your advice."
Why does the orphan eat water with cereal?
Mom forgot to come back with the milk.
Where's your mom?
In the bin.