A dyslexic man walked into a bra.
Stephen Hawking's death was simply an accident. He pressed power off instead of sleep mode.
The reason he died is that they accidentally flipped the wrong light switch.
You do not spell "computer" like this; you spell it like this: "cumputer."
A is for apple, B is for dyslexia—oh wait, no! That’s D!
My ex got into a bad accident recently. I told the doctors the wrong blood type. Now she will really know what rejection feels like.
So three retards walk into a classroom...
Sike, it was the garbage. They mistook it for their classroom.
I tried to take a fog machine, but I took the wrong one. Needless to say, it was a big mist-take.
Why were you born?
Because I asked out your mom on accident.
Why did he die?
Because God made a mistake and pressed Ctrl+Z.
Stephen Hawking's death was purely accidental. He clicked “shut-down” instead of “sleep”.
If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?
Were you born on the side of the highway because that’s where all mistakes happen?
Guy spills milk on me. I say, "It's okay, we all make mistakes sometimes, but apparently your mom made a big one."
What is a failed abortion? Annabelle.
My boss yelled at me the other day, “You’ve got to be the worst train driver in history. How many trains did you derail last year?”
I said, “Can’t say for sure, it’s so hard to keep track!”
What did God say when he made Jake Paul?
"Oops, I made a mistake."
The dyslexic devil worshipper sold his soul to Santa.
What do you call a steak that tastes bad?
A MISsteak.
The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
