Miscellaneous jokes
What do you call an animal with 3 eyes, 2 mouths, 6 noses, and 4 ears?
Why did half of the world go to hell?
Because they were laughing at morbid jokes.
(You've been warned!)
Manchester City is gay.
Do you want to go to the pool?
Yes? Well, water you waiting for?
What do you get when you cross an eagle with a lion?
A griffin.
The reason I'm gay is because I'm scared of getting cooties.
How do you make a dead baby float?
Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!
How do you make a blond snowman? You can't, you have to hollow out the head.
Why did the out of shape cow quit her job?
She got tired of jumping over the moon.
What's worse than funny condom fails?
Jake Paul.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Your mom.
Your mom who?
O shit, my mom's home! Honey, get the f*** out of my house!
Why are you censoring my friend Franz? He's just making jokes, but you admins get offended too easily, f*cktards!
I like fire trucks and monster trucks.
You heard a conversation between Sans and Papyrus:
Sans: "Sub bro."
Papyrus: "DON'T 'SUB' ME BROTHER! YOU STILL DIDN'T REDINTEGRATE YOUR PUZZLES!"
Sans: "Easy bro, I have done a ton of work today."
Sans: "A skele-ton."
(Drum effect)
Papyrus: "OH MY GOD SANS!"
What do Indian hip hop artists eat?
Rice rice baby.
My life.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
'Cause they're dead.
What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and the other is just a watermelon.
What is the butt’s favorite computer?
The Tushiba.
7 little children gathered around the bed Bill Cosby's fantasy.
All he wants to do is tickle the kids, it's as plain as can be.
7 cellmates gathered around the bed ready to rape Bill Cosby instead.