Miscellaneous jokes
What's the difference between a square peg in a round hole and a kilo of lard?
One's a good lot of fat; the other's a fat lot of good.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
Wanna hear a skeleton joke?
Sorry, I don't have the guts to tell it.
I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.
Yeah, she called me "Pledge" because I knocked the dust off it.
Build a man a fire, he will be warm for a day. Give him some Tfox merch, and he will be on fire.
Anyone who makes fun of Prof should go to hell.
She invited me in the house, and we started makin' out again.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
'Cause they're dead.
What do you call a Mexican in the zombie apocalypse?
Answer: "Sweet and spicy chicken."
Roses are red, Kevin Spacey is gay,
If you'd stayed with your parents, I wouldn't have taken you away.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Answer:
To prove it wasn't chicken!
Two TV antennas got married. The church ceremony was terrible, but the reception was fantastic!
Yes.
My favorite instrument? The TromBONE, of course.
My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.
Want to hear a joke?
My life. Get it?
Why was 6 scared of 7?
Answer: Because 7 8 9.
What do you call a psychic dwarf on the run? A small medium at large.
I'm taking a guitar lesson at school. My band instructor told me he was going to hit me with my guitar. I asked him if that was a fret.