It's better being depressed and suicidal than being happy, know why? Happiness never lasts forever.
My only friend who actually cares: "Stop making suicide jokes, I’m really concerned!"
Me: Okay, I’ll cut it out.
I told my suicidal friends to stop posting suicidal memes. They said they will stop soon.
Roses are red, my mental health is blue, Karen got no mom like you.
What school does a depressed middle school kid go to?
KMS.
All these suicide jokes are f***ing killing me.
What's the hardest thing when working with the severely mentally handicapped?
My dick.
ADHD stands for Attention Deficit Hey Donut.
Mom: That's why your dad left you.
Me: Why?
Mom: I mean look at you, depressed, suicidal, and unhappy, always anxious, and other mental health issues.
Me: How is that my fault? You are a rude mom!
Mom: Your dad had a heart attack two weeks before you were born, because you are ugly!
(This actually did happen in real life.)
Why do people who get shot in the head always become therapists?
They are more open-minded.
Why did the cheese go to therapy? Because it had too many emotional holes.
Why can't depressed people make depression jokes? Because they can't talk if they are dead.
What do you call a polar bear with mood swings?
A bipolarbear
Lol
I'm not suicidal, I'm just speedrunning life.
Somebody asked me, "What's that on your arm?" I just said, "My cats got OCD."
You know what really gets me under my skin when I'm down? Sharpener blades.
What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person?
If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.
Suicide is never the answer.
Suicide is the question.
The answer is yes.
I don't call it suicide. I call it population control.
To whoever stole my antidepressants, I hope you are happy now.
