New Mental Health Jokes - Page 16

I was having issues in my personal and professional life. I hated everyone. I was on the brink of a mental breakdown and depression. I decided to see a therapist about it. The therapist suggested that I should write letters to the people I hate and then burn them. I must admit I feel much better...

But now I don't know what to do with the letters.

Imagine you're playing GTA and you finally found out how to take out a gun: Option 1: shoot someone Option 2: suicide

Me: Aren't they the same thing?

Emo kids counting be like: 1, 2, 3 come hang with me! 4, 5, 6 Gonna get new slits! 7, 8, 9 Suicide! 10, 11, 12 Bring some pills!

People say that they can read people's faces; then how come nobody sees me breaking inside?

I was gonna tell a self harm joke, but realized it would cause too much pain.

What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza? Pizza won't cut itself.

How long does it take for a depressed person to change a light bulb?

5 days. & I’m pretty proud of myself.

What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza?

Pizza won't cut itself.

What's an emo's least favorite show?

Dr. Phil.

What's young, red, and has hot PTSD?

Prince Andrew's victims.

Irritable Bowel Syndrome saved me from depression...

It’s hard to feel empty when you’re so full of shiii fuck ur mom.

Maybe if the grass on my front lawn had depression, It would cut itself.

What's a depressed person's favorite drink?

Depresso expresso.

JK, it's bleach.

So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging themselves? I guess they lost Hangman.

My friend: You really need to stop the SH jokes.

Me: But they're not that long.

Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.

And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.