How many children does Explain Bear have?
This is 15 first-year treating a swan.
Students return: "Without payment?"
The word "I die with many important problems."
Later, you answer this point: "DSD, rats?"
How many police officers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two: one to change the lightbulb, and the other to open fire while the room is dark.
How many potatoes to feed the elephant?
Why can't you play poker in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
How names were named.
"I have to go because my tailor is at the gym where he will chase coal before dawn."
"SAY THAT AGAIN. SO MANY GOOD NAMES!"
Why did the rapper go to the dentist?
Because he had too many FILL-INS.
Why was the rapper always in shape?
Because he dropped so many BARS, he had to stay fit to pick them up!
How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
None, because they're so DARN STUPID!!!!
Once I went to a museum and overheard someone speaking to an employee for information.
"These are lying clocks, they tell how many lies a person tells."
"Oh, cool."
"This is Mother Teresa’s clock; the clock hasn’t moved because she never lied."
"Makes sense."
"This is Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands only moved twice, indicating he only lied twice."
"Where’s Trump’s clock?"
"Oh, we’re using it as a ceiling fan."
And then I burst out laughing 'cause it’s so true.
Don’t suicide! Please don’t, it’s horrible, and you will hurt so many people that love you.
That’s why no one will be hurt.
How many dead babies does it take to paint my room?
It depends how many bullets you have.
What do you call it when a watch has too many belts?
A waist of your time.
Why did Alice from Wonderland get her butt stuck in the rabbit hole at first? Because she probably ate too many hamburgers and drank too much wine just out of nowhere, then told her butt to hold it in before more food pops out.
So many of these jokes are unoriginal, and you guys need to step up your game.
Q: How many more chemo treatments did the cancer patient need?
A: Tumor.
Billy moved in with 69 pedophiles when he was 8. Many "tears" came across his cheeks.
"How do celebrities stay cool?"
"They have many fans!"
What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... How many fingers am I holding up?
A calendar asked the doctor how many time he's got left. The doctor replied: "'Til December."