Many jokes
My parents used to make me and my siblings apologize to the ground when we stomped.
If I had done "it," I would have gotten SO many apologies.
How many thots have I bullied?
Three. The rest are dead.
my grandfather cant a woman's taco anymore cause his balls fell off from getting to many tacos
How many emissions does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and cry.
A boy couldn't walk normally because his pants were huge, and when he went to school, the people there made so many jokes about him that he died.
IT'S NOT TRUE, JUST A FAKE JOKE, DON'T WORRY!
Anyone want a free pizza? Because you liking a pizza with toppings that not many people enjoy allows you to eat the entire guilt free pizza, that they said they didn't want and everyone already offered you a slice of.
Butcher knives are great tools for cutting many things!
Fruit, vegetables, my arms.
How many crack heads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, there is no electricity.
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!
Your Friend: Bro, I'm having a movie sleepover tonight. I've invited 17 people, wanna come?
You: Yeah, but why so many people?
Your Friend: Because the DVD says only 18+ viewers.
You: Dude!!!!
How many clickbait articles does it take to change a lightbulb? The answer may shock you!
Why doesn’t Ganon search the web very often? Because there’s too many links.
Why can't you play poker in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
My sister looks like Santa Claus.
"You are so pretty?"
"No, too many people!"
Why did so many people die in the Grenfell Fire Disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
How many times did Rob O'Neill shoot Bin Laden? 911 times.
Akbar: How many crows are there, Birbal?
Birbal: 8,971.
Akbar: What if there are fewer?
Birbal: Then some crows went on vacation to visit their relatives.
Akbar: What if there are more?
Birbal: Then some came on vacation here to visit their relatives.
Once I went to a museum and overheard someone speaking to an employee for information.
"These are lying clocks, they tell how many lies a person tells."
"Oh, cool."
"This is Mother Teresa’s clock; the clock hasn’t moved because she never lied."
"Makes sense."
"This is Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands only moved twice, indicating he only lied twice."
"Where’s Trump’s clock?"
"Oh, we’re using it as a ceiling fan."
And then I burst out laughing 'cause it’s so true.
Don’t suicide! Please don’t, it’s horrible, and you will hurt so many people that love you.
That’s why no one will be hurt.
How many dead babies does it take to paint my room?
It depends how many bullets you have.